Rob Zombie: An Excerpt from “The Great Pumpkin Letters”
Hey Mr. Rob Zombie!
It's the Great Pumpkin writing to the Greatest Director of All Time.
Yeah, lurking inside that warped mind of Rock and Roll Bad Asses
You are going to go on an incredible journey Rob! You see I just
got a letter from a Character in a Movie you are going to Direct in
The Near Future. How near you ask? Listen up Rob. Now this is
important. The Character in The Movie you are going to Direct
Mr. Z is none other than Chief Crazy Captain Christo. He has been
putting the finishing touches on a screen play that you will adapt into
a Hollywood Blockbuster, loosely based on the Greatest Character
Ever created by Charles Schultz. Hey Rob It's Me The Great Pumpkin.
Chief Crazy Captain Christo told me and I quote, “ Rob Zombie's
the only director I would trust in a Sea of Same Ol Lame Ol. Rob has
not only got the talent of a Great Artist but a Director's Eye that is
sure to impress .
Chief Crazy Captain Christo is
going down to Nebraska in July of 2010 to Challenge Old Man Buffett
to a game of Who's the Richest Man now? He wants you to be there Rob.
Chief Crazy Captain Christo says “... The comfort zone for the Rich will
evaporate in front of everyone's eyes. That is after the Great Pumpkin rises
out of the Pumpkin Patch ... you know the story. Chief Crazy Captain Christo
wants to show you Mr. Zombie the keys to Erasing the National Debt. Before
any of the old crony club beats you Rob. C'mon, Chief Crazy Captain Christo
wants you to bring Ozzy Osbourne and Zakk Wylde with you so you will all
be witnesses to the new order of doing things.
But be forewarned Rob. If you don't show up or get in touch with Chief Crazy
Captain Christo, you're going to lose out to another Director named Grant Heslov,
in the immortal words of Little Nicky, “ he's no George Clooney... but he hangs out
with him” Chief Crazy Captain Christo also met Fred Savage from The Wonder Years.
Now who do you think would do a better job. A Zombie or a Savage. I thought so Rob.
Just show up in Omaha in July of 2010. The screenplay will be completely finished by then.
Oh and one last thing Rob. Chief Crazy Captain Christo has informed me ,The Great
Pumpkin, that once you see the screenplay, you will flip out completely. It is your
Dream Movie that Chief Crazy Captain Christo says, Not only will I give the movie
rights to Mr. Zombie, but I will also organize a fundraiser the likes the World has never
seen. It involves the present day President of the United States and his team of Professional
All- Stars ( including Michael Jordan) vs the Team of Zombies ( thirteen of the finest Rock
and Roll game changers in a game played with Special Rules only Chief Crazy Captain Christo knows.
The names for these two teams are also confidential to be released only to you Rob.
This is what is called in the business, Trust is Earned and Rob you have Earned it.
Chief Crazy Captain Christo also wants to say Thank you for your Inspiring Theme Songs to life!
So there you have it in a nutshell Rob Zombie. July 2010 Stay tuned. This is
The Great Pumpkin and This has been The First in a Series of “ The Great Pumpkin
Letters” coming soon to be played out for real! Oh and ah Rob, Chief Crazy Captain Christo
in no uncertain terms scolded me for calling you Mr. Z. He said, “ Great Pumpkin, even you
shall call him Dr. Z . for every great director is a doctor at heart bringing films to life!”
but I think you and Zakk and all your buddies should ROCK BALLS in Dallas next year for Dimebag and Stevie Ray Vaugn. What say you ROB ZOMBIE?! Now that would truly be a
Super Sunday!!
Christo Strom is the website owner of www.unitetwosites.com
He is currently working on a new site that will be a membership site for a new Art , Music and Movie Studio being built in July 2010
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